unpredictable journal

31 January 2005

I was pissed off when Kelly phoned me and asked what time I'm going to work. Of course is as usual 4pm la. But she told me to report at 3pm because Mdm had setted a high target for us. Pls lor, got ppl buy means got ppl buy, no ppl buy no matter how early I go there and promote also no use lor. Haix... Some more it's none of your business whether we met the target or not right? The shop is not your's what. Well, she just act as if she's the supervisor or whatever shit...

Reached there at 3pm, but no people lor, so didn't really promote much. Until around evening, no need promote also got people come and buy. Exactly what I've said, you don't 've to promote much if people wanna buy, but when there's no one who's willing to buy, no matter how hard you tried to convince them, they'll still not buy.

Very tiring, Christina boss chased her back home this evening cuz she was chatting with Lin Qu. Luckily is chased back home not fired her. Haha...

Erm... worked till 10pm then come back home. Haha, they extended the hours. Hm... having 3 off days. Haha... that's great man! Hoho~~

I did a rough calculating, so far I've earned $147.50 for working around 7 days. Good good... better than nothing.

Guess I can't take shrimp roll cuz allergy to it. Eat le, whole body itchy man! But is really nice, delicious. Haha... and because of casava cheese cookies and mini shrimp roll, I gained 2kg! Shit shit shit... where can... right? Haha... gonna do sit up again.

Tomorrow promised mom that I'll help her do some spring cleaning. Hopefully I kept my words. In the afternoon, gonna bring her go pioneer mall to shop shop. Haha...

Hm... guess that's about all...

I hope I'll luv myself more

01:19

30 January 2005

Oh my god! I got up so early in the morning and slept so late yesterday, shit! Later still 've to go co and work, I'm afraid I'd be sleepy during work.

Dad always so rough, he was doing some cleaning and I was being woke by him at 7am plus. Sigh, every Sunday I'd woke up early all because of him. Last few weeks, he was turning the radio so loud that I can't continue to sleep any more. And this week... sigh.

Yesterday didn't went for SP cuz of something else important. Sigh... missed one lesson man! But did practice a lot at home, glad.

I hope I'll luv myself more

08:38

29 January 2005

Oh yah! One piece of good news! I got the edusave bursary application form. Haha... that means I might 've the chance to qualify for it. Well, $400 man, although is not much but can help me cover 4 months of internet and handphone bills man! Haha...

I hope I'll luv myself more

01:28

28 January 2005

Today practiced cello immediately when I get up of my bed. And get prepared only at 3pm cuz mom bought lunch for me. So was a little rush for me but luckily I made it on the dot.

Hm... it was damn bored, I was rather restless this evening, wondering why. But quite many customers today, so guess the sale was pretty good?

I saw this maid with this little girl everyday, and this little girl adores me damn lot! I'm loving her, asking her to call "jie jie" but she refused when I know she knew how to call. Her name is Yu shan... has the look of our class tai tai (Shirly)

"ve a chat with the girl who is tending the stall opposite mine, her name was Lin Qu, unique? Haha... she's a very quite and nice lady that I love chatting with. At first she was damn quiet but till now then she started to talk to me. Hm... saw her whole family yesterday, haha... they purchased some cakes and the fruit cakes taste the nicer, Lin Qu told me.

Hm... today me bought 4 breads (Cheese, mayonise, tuna and kaya) cost me $3.15 after discount. Ai yo still expensive. Haha... guess next time ask mummy buy better. Erm, the one mash potato for my niece, fries for kor and shrimp roll for myself. Haha... and guess I spent $15 over. Haix...

Now wondering what should I buy as gift for couple for relatives.

I hope I'll luv myself more

23:40

27 January 2005

Die le... help help!!!

Die lar, this whole week I didn't practice cello at all other than going for the SYCO practices. Shit... cannot like that la, jialat man! Anyone care to help?

Pioneer mall never had a promoter that work long except for me. Sigh... now still only me one promoter jialat, no off day. Take leave only for the SYCO practices. Ai yo... jialat ley like that. Sigh... me nowadays kinda back to the abnormal lifestyle. Today slept till 1pm then woke up, ai yo... not enough time for me to practice cello man! Cuz by 2.30pm gotta go shower le, only about 1hr... not enough man! Haix... then wk till night then come back, sianz... not dare to practice cuz scare disturb my neighbour. Ai yo... Shit man! Haix... maybe later don't shower, come back from work then shower lor, like that I can practice till 3.30pm man! Idea right?

Just a short entry later come back from wk update more. Take care everyone!

Update

Ai yo, think don't wanna practice cello le la, now already 1.33pm haix... jialat. Now I finally understand why Mr Ji don't wanna let us work le. Haix...

MH job better, cuz is from 8am-5pm, reach home also around 5.30pm then can rest, shower, eat dinner and then practice cello till wanna slp. Good good man. Actually mine also can, wake up earlier. But just that... sigh...

Yesterday, we had our SYCO sectional practice. Shit! Damn bored man! A 2.5hrs of sectional, guess Mr Ji only listen to 15mins of our combine thingy. The rest of the time he's not in the room. Sigh... sad case man! Luckily MH and YY didn't go. Haix... esp YY.

Hm... heard Elgin and Ryan played the bach... nice nice worx. Haha... Mr Ji always say Ryan don't wanna practice, but I think Ryan really improved a lot, he did practice. He memorised the J.S Bach Suite No 1!!! That's power right? Not like me. Haha... Mr Ji asked both of them to play but sigh... Ryan said he didn't practice. Sad case ar, really wanna listen to him play... hehe... Elgin too.

Hm... now then noe that Audrey had her grade 7 piano cert and a grade 5 theory. Hoho!!! Haix... wondering when can I've my theory grade taken. Haix... She learn double bass in school too. Haha... her mom taught her the piano I guess. Haha...

Envy all these ppl ley... learn piano and cello de. Some more did so well in both insturments. Haix...

Hm... that's all...

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:16

25 January 2005

New template

Just got a new template, nice? Haha... it's still under construction. Hm, sianz going to shower now and later going to work. Guess the completion of this renovation won't be done so fast. Cuz rather busy recently.

Haha, thought I'll practice cello this afternoon but guess no time le... today break. Haha... tomorrow morning then practice ba.

That's all... tata... take care everyone!

I hope I'll luv myself more

14:29

Some thoughts in the middle of the night

Haha... today went out of house at 6pm when I know that I'm meeting them at 5.50pm at the JP control station. Cuz thought that Percie gonna be late again, but who knows she went to Jp together with Jo straight from school CO.

We reached SCH around 6.55pm and Audrey asked me to help her to tune her cello. Her cello was very difficult to tune luckily Elgin helped me out if not guess everyone will be waiting for me. Haha... people who knows me well should that I'm afraid of tuning cello and if I was asked to tune, I'd be damn gentle simple because I'm afraid that the string might broke any time. Wahaha... even Mr Ji knows that I'm afraid of it too... So each time when I know that I couldn't tune the cello any further, I'll get help from other people. Clever? So hardly broke the string and therefore when people tune their cello and broke the strings I'll like having some stupid attitude. Haha... ;p

During combine practice, Mr Quek emphasized that we shoudn't tune our instrument any other where other than on the stage. Must we really be semi-profession?

When I'm waiting for the 2 DA XIAO JIE, Jo and PC to pack their things, MH told me that I SHOULD help Jo to put some rosin on the end peg so that the string will not out of tune frequently. Pls lor, Jo so big lady le not a kid man! Beside I've told her before, is just that she's lazy to do it herself. For my heaven sake, she don't even care why should I?

On our way to MRT station, MH told me a lot of things regarding Mr Ji told him on Sunday. Mr Ji don't really 've the intention of asking each an everyone of us to perform individually except for Percie and XW. Cuz he wanna them to be embarrass when they didn't perform well and so they 'll practice harder the next time. And therefore MH thinks that I should help Percie out. OMG! I loves teaching juniors but definitely not her, cuz I don't like the attitude of her. Forever won't be serious, so what's the point teaching her?

Mr Ji asked MH among the three of us who do he think that played well. And I was really taken aback when MH told Mr Ji is me. And more worse, Mr Ji said correct. It's not really played well but is who's better. The reason lies on the hours I practiced at home as compared to him and Jo. I do not know who really practiced for hours at home, but I admit I don't practice everyday but if I practice, I practice a minimum of 1.5hrs and a maximum of 5hrs at home. And w/o fail, I'll definitely spend at least 45mins on scales.

Mr Ji told him that among all his students, he can only tell that Elgin and I really practice a lot at home. Yes, Elgin definitely practiced a lot at home. But Mr Ji think that I practiced a lot is actually wrong, he judged it by the hard skins formed on my finger tips. Is a big mistake man! Or maybe, among all of us, the two of us really practiced the most whereas the others I do not know.

MH he can really do well if he practiced hard. But he once told me before he's not interested in winning anyone of us which I think is a lie. Haha... as for Jo I can understand when she don't do well, cuz her schedule was like damn tight? But she just a little bone idle, if not guess she've been improved a lot during the december school holiday if she practiced hard. Me can only do well when I practiced a lot a lot. Ji once said before, ppl who practiced a lot might not be improving a lot whereas ppl hardly practice, they tends to improve faster. Haha... well this 've to depend on individual.

Some time I felt that I'm kinda stupid to help ppl out like Jo and PC. Cuz I'm just helping them to improve but I didn't thought of they might win/beat me one day. Well, guess only those ppl who beat me one fine day, then I'll really practice hard. But some time, I just couldn't stand the stupid attitude they gave me and they seems like don't fancy it. Sigh... MH say that they should be glad to 've such a wonderful senior<--( he really used this word). Haha... how wonderful can I be when some don't seems like appreciate my kindness. Sigh...

I hope I'll luv myself more

02:54

24 January 2005

Guess yesterday was the day that I think the time past damn fast when I'm working ba. Maybe it was due to many customers sampling the cookies and I was like busying entertaining them. Hm... can say that it's also the first time that I enjoy working there.

Went back home mom told me she didn't cook and didn't buy my dinner for me. Then I told her nevermind, I eat maggie mee and I called her to cook for me. She asked me wanna eat maggie mee or KFC. Then I think again, then I told her I better eat KFC. Wahaha... she asked me go to her wallet and take money but I don't want, I used mine. Sob... $9.95 man! Haix...

Shared it with kor gf and both dad and mom had the salad.

Not very sure why recently I don't feel hungry even w/o eating anything for the whole day. Haha... guess it was the excess fats in the body that was converted to energy ba. Haha...

Sigh... very bored at home. Go out more sianz, sure gonna spend money and that really breaks my heart. So better stay at home.

Oh yah, before I forget, my god-daughter interview with Josephine Mdm to work as promoter. And Mdm told her to go JP but she don't wanna, then mdm asked me to go. Haix... sianz 1/2. But luckily is Jp not westmall or whatever... haix...

Hm... long time didn't play the sims le, wanna play... but also wanna practice cello. Haha... maybe play for 1.5hrs and that gonna be 2.30pm then go and practice cello till 4pm ba. Haha... kk... good idea...

(c",)

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:44

22 January 2005

Tired

Yesterday went work kinda tired, but my neighbour (the shop on the right of our outlet) very nice, they chit chat with me etc... very nice of them.

Although it's just a 5.5hrs of promotion, I was like damn tired. Haha, just like the first them I work as promoter. Guess after a few days, if u wanna call me stand for 12 hours also no problem man! Haha... just now used to it now.

Today actually start work at 4pm but I told Oliva that I wanna come at 5pm cuz wanna go for sectional practice. Some more, not very sure what time Mr Ji's coming. If he's coming at 2pm then I'll attend lesson with him for 2hrs, if he come at 2.30pm, then I'll attend lesson with him for only 1.5hrs cuz me leaving at 4pm. So... like that lor. Haix...

Hm... later not very sure what Mr Ji will call us to play. Hopefully no more SYCO scores, cuz I really can't wait for him to comment on those homework he had given to us during Dec holiday. So pls ar, no more SYCO thingy!!!

Still wondering should I go home and put my cello or go straight to work after practice. Then is a either of leaving cello there or bring it to work. Haix... wonder wonder...

Tomorrow combine practice at 10am to 1pm after which still 've to stay for meeting. Guess I'm not staying, going back home to rest for a while after which going to work. Sigh, scare that SQ not happy with me. Haix...

Tired... (o_oll)

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:30

21 January 2005

Wednesday it was a misunderstanding between MH and me. Thought he don't wanna help me fetch XW but I was wrong, he's working and he's afraid that he might not be there on time. So... sorry man!

Hm... really very mad with XW... told him to wait at his bus stop but end up he waited at my house bus stop. Ai to... then end up his mom told me to meet at the control station. So I took cab down there... haix...

During sectional practice everything went smoothly. Audrey and Li yuan/Yi yuan didn't come, kinda miss them... Muhaha...

Mr Ji has set most part of the bowing and fingering for us, that's good right? Hehe... seating arrangement too, haix... cannot sit with XW le... sob...

After practice, most of them looks tired... luckily me now having holiday man! Yeah! If not me sure cannot take it de, too tiring le. Hm, when we reach Boon Lay Interchange, we decided to go to pioneer mall and 've our supper!!! So we went there and reached home around 1150pm? Late for people who needs to go school the next day? Haha...

Then yesterday accompanied Jo to hunt for jacket, and she bought one, quite nice. Then went back home, I sleep le... tired as I woke up at 7am plus in the morning. Haha...

Me wanna buy a jean jacket, G-DANO cost $79, a jean also G-DANO cost $69 and another orange colour jean, RED cost $40+. If me really gonna buy... think my pay also not enough...

I dreamt of Mr Ji in the bus, asking us to pick and perform individual when the bus driver drove the bus. If I'm not wrong, I dreamt I played No 45 and he comment loaded of both bad and good things. But is still scary... he seems to be very agitated in my dream. Ai yo... ... ...

Later going to work, haha... hopefully I'll stay to the job for 2 wks. Once CNY over, no need to work le, so gotta hold to it for just 2 wks. Beside, Mr Ji also aware about it, so doesn't matter. Unlike MH, he work doubt he told Mr Ji about it, cuz he's afraid that he might get killed by him. Haha... some more, is actually okay to me if I'm a teacher, cuz is just a 2 wks work too. So... pray hard for him man....

I hope I'll luv myself more

10:24

19 January 2005

Later gonna 've SYCO sectional practice, sianz 1/2 cuz is Mr Ji teach. Wahaha... very tiring, but bo bian, still 've to go.

Now me still wondering should I go and bring Xuan Wei. Haix... his dad gonna be very rush if he's coming back home to fetch him there, so me think that I should help him since I've got nothing better to do at home. So guess I should made up my mind soon, cuz now is nearly 5pm.

Actually thought of asking MH to help Lao Da bring XW de, cuz me take bus from here to there is not very convenient, 've to walk a long path way, but MH seems like don't wish to help. Well, nvm, cuz is my promise to lao dao, I'll help him.

Haix... msn only 3 ppls online, in addition, I've got nothing to chat with them de... sianz... haix... that's about all ba...

I hope I'll luv myself more

16:55

18 January 2005

I do not understand her at all

Wa kao a... don't know what's wrong with mom. Keep wanting to move in the computer that is now in the living room. Sigh... she wanna moved it to elder kor room, sucks... the room already so small yet she wanna put so many things.

Now already 've a bed, cupboard and is already just nice, if she gonna shift the computer in, then guess it left with a narrow space to walk around.

I insisted I do not want it to be moved in, but she still wanna argue with me and now she happy, quarrel le. Sigh...

Mom and I have a very big difference in character. She dislike to open the window big, whereas I like the light that the sun shine in and the strong wind that came in from the window at night. I like the room to be airy but she just say that it dirties the room. Sigh...

Mom told me that she really do not like me learning cello whereas dad just think that learning cello won't earn much in future which is a wrong thought. But he didn't say that he dislike me learning it, unlike mom. I like to teach my niece new things unlike my mom just afraid that she might get hurt or whatsoever. There're a lot of things I like which my mom dislike, and things that I dislike, my mom like. Sigh... sometimes, I had been wondering why there're such a big gap in between us.

I don't mean to argue with her, but she just didn't know how narrow the room gonna be if she moved the computer in. Beside, the living room is quite spacious, so why not leave it there? Sigh... well, I do not know understand her well. Haix... by all means if you insist wanna move it in, but I'm definitely not going to help you at all! {','}

I hope I'll luv myself more

20:47

Disappointed

Sunday talked to my dad in the morning when I was about to be late for combine practice. He kept asking me about the cheque that was returned by the SYCO organization and I kept explain to him. When he finally understood, I was already late for combine practice and so I took a cab down there.

Rushed up there, as usual the few of us. Throughout the whole practice, cello ppl sat down there and do nothing. Sigh... wasted my cab fare.

Yesterday meet Jo at 5pm at my house void deck. We went to GP to get the Bach J.S (Six Suites) photocopied and then proceeded to BLCC. Finally I've completed the mission Mr Ji asked me to do and we took our cello and went to meet PC and MH at Boon Lay Control Station.

Thought that MH gonna be the last to come as he had never been punctual before. But I was wrong... he was 2 mins earlier? Whereas PC was 10 mins late, that I was so stunned! I wonder what's wrong with me yesterday, I know I can't afford to wait for others but still I waited for her 10 mins and she still haven't reach yet and I left. I find that I was kinda stupid, as I've said, I can't afford to wait for ppl but why still wasted the 10 mins to wait for her? Sigh...

Perhaps, I just want to be more patience or should I say I thought she wouldn't be so late? Well... I didn't wait for her and left was because of couples of reasons:

I admit I'm not so patience to wait for ppl
I wanna her to know that not punctual is not tolerable
I'm not good to be pissed off

One's must learn not to be punctual but to be early. I left because I wanna help her to kick off her habit... if we waited for her this time round, she gonna be late the next time. She told she was not feeling well, but both Jo and I having terrible headache too. Not feeling well doesn't mean you can excuse yourself for being late, it's just an excuses than I find it amusing. As she know herself very well, she everytime late, then she should make an effort to went out of her house earlier right? Sigh... I really do not 've the intention to hurt you.

We left earlier than MH as he waited for PC. But we reached the conference hall at the same time. Shit... it was so pai-sey... And I do not know why must he made the "Hm hm... " sound. And I was really pissed off by that. What is he trying to say, just say it out.

It was kinda funny when there's one person in the woodwind gp told me that the door is lock. Wahaha... then I try to open it and I manage, it wasn't lock! Haha... can't really blame him... cuz the door was really heavy, sometimes I don't 've the strength to open it too.

Reached there and I saw Elgin, he smiled. I always like his simle, he nv fail to smile when we met. And of course, he nv fail to ask "How are you?" ... and everytime, I'll just tell him how I'm feeling today.

ET: "Ni hao ma?"

Me: "Wo bu hao! Ying hui wo de junior qi fu wa"

ET: :Bu shi ni qi fu ta men meh?"

Me: "Wo na li you, wo dui na men hen hao de worx..."

Both of us laughted...

Although it's just a short conversation, but it was really nice to chat with him.

Then I continue to help Audrey to tune her cello. Wow... very difficult to tune. Still as usual, talked to me still will like move her body here and there... haha... nervous?

So it was our very first combine practice and I was very disappointed with my performance. It was like sucks, I just couldn't catch up most of the time. How careless I'm always forgotten to repeat, to raised the notes when necessary. Haix...

Whereas, Yi Yuan (A girl who's going to take her diploma in music, cello soon), Elgin, Ryan played well, Jo, MH, CH and XW played not bad too. So me the one... who played like sucks man! Also not very sure what's wrong with me. They played so relax, esp Ryan... no stress man! Haha... envy him so much... Haix... what' else can I comment when I don't practice much of cello at home? Yesterday performance really made me decided to practice hard...

We 've our break, and MH came to me and asked me to ask Yi Yuan to play the Bach J.S Six Suite 1 for us and I told him that me not dare. So he told me he will go and ask then. So Elgin, MH and I were there to listen... she didn't stop at all in the middle. Wow... that's marvellous! Haha... but she was really humble, keep on shaking her head when we commented that she played well. Haha... only humble ppl will manage to learn things from others.

"Humble" it reminds me when kor was scolded by dad when he was a kid. Dad told him that we've to be humble... ... ... *Forgotten le*

Hm... back to topic, erm... Ryan... I really hope that he would at least say "Hi"... he did yesterday but guess that's not what I really wanted. I've know him for 1yr or so but we seldom chat face-to-face but of course in msn. I can't expect much from him, cuz it's his character right? Kk... don't force him... but a "Hi" I still expect from him worx... haix...

Hm... if I'm not wrong, I've not been eating a proper meals for 2days. If today, still didn't eat dinner, guess tml I'm going to be extremely weak. Sunday I was out the whole day, about 10pm then I reach home. Didn't eat the whole day, thought that dad would 've bought my dinner but who knows he didn't. Sigh... I don't wish to blame mom, but still I wanna say, she should 've called me and asked me to eat before go back home. So yesterday, as usual, I don't 've my lunch only dinner. So I was out the whole evening for the SYCO combine practice, and I went back home, nothing for me. Sigh... mom asked me to cook maggie mee... but I don't want, cuz I really do not 've the appetite to eat. So I did a wash-up and get my clothes changed and I slept le... *Tired*

Until now... still not hungry... haix... detest myself for being so lazy. Wahaha... I've said before, I rather die of hunger than having to go and get myself to buy my own meal although there's a food court just opposite my house. Haix...

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:35

15 January 2005

Today woke up late man, so was late for practice. Mr Ji didn't say anything. Throughout the whole practice, we were practicing the SYCO pieces. Mr Ji again and again emphasized that "SHA DI ER CHUAN QI" very difficult, the four or five or us these few days 've to practice together. Xuan Wei will be my partner, Mr Ji fixed it. Frankly speaking, I could wish to sit with someone whom I does not know well. Haha... like that leh, I can know that person better ma. Haha... but nvm den... can disturb him... Muahaha...

After practice, Mr Ji and I walked out to the bus stop. On our way, he talked to me about many things. He raised the past issue when I was calling them back for self-practice etc. He said that I stand the most credit and follow by him. If wasn't I the one who willing to spend so much time guiding them, and he the one forced and forced us again and again, guess today all juniors couldn't have such a good results.

The one who stand the most credits guess should be all my juniors. They willing to come back for self practice and also, they practiced hard themselves. If not, no matter how much I'm willing to teach them also meaningless. Right?

To see them have such a good results and some even went over me (played cello better than me) me also very happy. No regrets... If none of them over me, guess I might become arrogant. And that's sucks... ! Luckily someone saved me...

Hm... to date, I've graduated I will try to avoid teaching juniors. If gonna teach, me gonna 've a serious A.P and afraid that they might not like it. In addition, all of them are from express, doubts they will 've the time to come back for self-prac. Even if they wished so much, doubts their parents would allow them. So is better for me to stay away from them.

Some more, I think is time to let their leader to guide and teach them. To show great leadership to the teachers-in-charge in order to qualify for the EAGLES award.

Enough of all these

So just now went to Pioneer Mall to 've my interview. Shit, is Oliva the one who's in-charge. Sianz... but bo bian... wanna money ma... so... haix...

She said she'll call me once start work...

I hope I'll luv myself more

15:28

Now is already 12:55AM and I'm still awake. Later 10:00AM gonna have sectional practice at ex-sch... sianz... wondering will I be able to wake up or not.

Actually after practice, wanna ask Jo acc me to JP cuz me wanna buy something. And then go to Clementi to buy shorts, running out man! Haha... then at night, go to pioneer mall and have my interview.

But pitiful, she still have to stay back for the combine practice. Wondering can I borrow her from the condutor?

Guess, Monday was the day that I'm looking forward to. Cuz it's the SYCO first combine practice, kinda nervous... wondering why...

Well, just hope to have fun...

Take care everybody...

I hope I'll luv myself more

01:55

13 January 2005

How nice of mom

Today slept till 2.30pm+ then woke up by mummy. She said she bought my favourite food, YA MIAN for me... hoho~~ delicious worx!

Sigh... don't know why, the longer hours I sleep, the more tired I'm. Sigh... now still very sleepy. Hm... haven't practice cello for the day, maybe later in the evening? Now let me play The Sims 2 first. Haix... yesterday I answered the wrong answer and that's it, I got a fine, $20,000... haix... cum demote... sad right?

KK... that's it... take care everybody...

Update

Sigh... I felt totally useless, everyday stay at home and take my allowances from my parents. Actually, they're very nice, esp dad. No matter did I go to school or work, he'll still give me money. Mom too, but she threatened me... saying she's not going to give me any more money, cuz that'll made me lazy to find for job. Haix...

I wish I could find a job soon... but I'm really lazy to go down to 've the interview. Haix... nvm about that, what if, they asked me to wait for call? That gonna drives me nuts man!

Haix... now even quarrel with kor over a comb. Sigh... that time, my comb lost, he say he gave me his spare comb. But now, his comb lost and said that, that time he only said he lent it to me until I got myself a new one... sigh... shit la, give it back to you!!! I don't fancy it lor...

Sob sob... he actually can help me buy, or should I say, he can go buy himself de. Cuz... he finish work at 9pm plus, reach home around 9.15pm... he can go to GP and buy de... but he refuse. Haix... he even ask me help him to buy light bulk for his fish tank. Haix... stupid ley... don't know how to buy yourself meh?

Mom... always like that, loves to cook a lot. Then left over call us to eat... haix... no wonder I'm like a giant!!! Haix...

And she another one, haix... she cannot go meet her then come and find me. Haix... no mood go shopping la!!!

Shit shit... all these ppl... haix...

I hope I'll luv myself more

16:35

12 January 2005

SYCO Orientation

The orientation started off with speech by the Director follow by Mr Tsung and ended by Mr Quek before we went for our tour. Coming back to the exhibition hall, we took our scores and finally we're dismissed...

We walked towards the main entrance and we saw Audrey, a cellist who knocked down Jo's cello stopper on that day (Audition). She apologized and Jo's was like nothing? Haha... she didn't comment anything when I think she should 've done so.

Audrey was very nervous as she couldn't stand still but just keep on moving left and right. I asked her why is she so nervous and I forgotten what she said. Hm... a very nice girl... hopefully I can get to know each of them better... hehe...

Hm... reach Jp we (Jo, cie cie and me) went shopping. Treated cie cie ate MA CHEE... sucks! Not hot enough, so hard to chew! Puke!!! Well... finally bought Love for Venus 5 le. Haix... haven't read yet, cuz yesterday night busying looking through the scores and arranged it in a file. Also bought Kit kat... recently can't live w/o it. Hm... After that, went back home le.

The practice schedule is from 7 to 9.30pm... it's pretty tiring for those who are schooling. Most practices held on the Monday and Tuesday for January and February. Haix... gonna miss my tv programmes again.

So those pieces weren't very difficult. Just the tempo was too fast, the rhythm and the change in the majors... so gotta be extra careful. *Tricky*

Kelly told me that JP B.solo needs promoter, but wonder what I'm I waiting for at home. Sigh... I should 've gone down for the interview myself today but just couldn't figure out why I'm still at home. Sigh... perhaps, I'm not independent enough, wanting to 've friends to work together with me.

Haix... or maybe if someone can just acc me go down and ask would be good enough for me?

Haix... not very sure...

Well, gonna practice cello... this Sat got lesson man!

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:30

11 January 2005

Wa... today total did 70 sit-ups then cannot take it le, head kinda dizzy. Wahaha... if everyday I could do 100 sit-ups that gonna be great!

Tomorrow, or I should say later in the evening going for the SYCO Orientation. Hopefully, it 'll ends at the latest by 8pm... cuz me wanna watch "My Lucky Charm".

Guess Jo was over-excited... she sms me and asked me what should we wear. Well, she sounded as if I know the answer. But using the brain to think, of course wear home clothes! Haha... she could thought of it, but I just didn't know why she still ask me this kind of question. That's why, I used "over-excited" to describe her.

To me, there's nothing to be excited about. It's just a training or workshop or whatever. Haix... don't think gonna 've fun going there. Well... it's still too early to comment.

Hm... that's about all...

Update

I had a nightmare again. I went out of the ladies without realising that my wallet had been dropped into the toilet bowl. When I realised that my wallet is missing, I quickly dash to the ladies and asked those girls did anyone saw my wallet. And they say yes but one stupid girl flush it away. I laughted...

And that's it... my hundred over dollars gone, my I/C... etc... I cried finally...

Haix...

Mom... sick le... I know of course she's not okay. But I'm gonna pray for her that she'll be healthy again after rest. Haix... -.- sad ar...

Later still gonna go for the Orientation... sianz 1/2... haix... tired...

I hope I'll luv myself more

01:47

10 January 2005

I missed CO

Wahaha... guess I missed CO very much. I was damn tired but still I made an effort to wake up early to 've a shower before I go to CO practice.

Thought I was late, but when I reached there, there're only 5 ppl in the plucking gp, around 9-12 of them in string gp and 2 ppl in the blowing gp. Haix... pathetic hor?

I've a dream, I dreamt that not many ppl came for CO practice... haha... and it happened.

Hm... we practiced 3 new year songs that we're going to perform. Forgotten the date already. Haha... 2 performances waiting for us...

CO ended, Li Suan played our concert video for us to see. Sigh... didn't manage to see the cello solo part. Haha... many ppl say that I played with lots of movement... wondering was it a good sign or... I'm just being exaggerated? Well, I just expressed the feelings that I think it should be for both pieces. I hope the way I perform did not bring any amusement to the audiences.

Hm... trying to borrow from Lick Suan, cuz just can't wait to see myself, the way that I 've such a great feelings... feeling so emotional in performing that two pieces... But Lick Suan die die also don't wanna lend me till next practice. Haix... still a long way to go...

It can be bought in a later time, haha... that's great... gonna buy one to keep it as a memory... yeah!

After which, actually wanna practice cello with Jo de, but SY keep talking to me. Then is a little embarrass to leave her alone when I know she've a lot of problems to share with me.

Hm... chatted nearly 6pm nearly 7pm+ then went home to watch the charity show. Guess the performer didn't practice much enough or I should say, they were trained in such a tight schedule that they didn't perform well for the skipping part.

Every year, Bryan's cried. Haha... I think he's emotional, but brother said he's just like a cry baby. Well, my brother do not know how pain to see yourself couldn't help others to raise fund by not doing a great performance. Sigh... all he knows is ??? Well, Bryan, u've my support... haha... work harder for next performance.

Hm... mom came back with her hair trimmed, dyed, styled and her eyebrowns trimmed too. Wahaha... looks like ah lian man... but is nice... so beautiful of her... loves you always my dearest mummy!

Mummy asked me go and trim my eyebrown too. But me don't know leh... my eyebrown is so alwful guess should be trimmed before my grad day. Haha...

Oh yah... gonna make my mummy buy the video CD for me, my performance video CD. Cuz who ask her to make an empty promise to me? Wahaha... yeah! =)

Hm... then mummy ask me go do rebonding. SHIT! I wanna CURL my hair... not rebond. And now... everything's gone... haix... I trimmed my hair not long ago too. Now it's so short, how am I going to curl my hair? Sigh... wondering why... many ppl asked me go and do rebonding... but I just don't like it...

Guess recently I've been eating too much that I dreamt that I gained 5kgs! The nightmare terrified me and I quickly woke up and ran to the storerm to get the weighing machine... it remains the same... Haix... Eat less exercise more pls!

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:08

08 January 2005

Sigh... just couldn't stand the attitude of my jie. She never go work can, kor never go work cannot. Sigh... as a sis to us, she should set a good example for us to follow. Leaving her daughter in childcare and asked my parents to pick her daughter up after school yet she herself is happily shopping with her friend. WTF...

Sometimes, I've the thoughts of giving up cello. I just couldn't stand the way that I live now, wake up, prac cello, eat, shower, surf net. Well, it sounds great, but I just felt that I'm damn useless... Sigh... I can't probably carry on like this for months right?

Learning cello and working at the same time is really difficult esp joining the SYCO. The practice schedule will definitely crush with my working time. Sigh... that's also why mom don't really like me to learn cello. She's actually very nice, I know she detest me learning cello yet she's willing to fork out any money in connection with cello for me. Sigh... I do not understand why...

Perhaps, I should really try to give up cello since I do not 've great potential and interest in playing it any more...

Sigh...

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:01

07 January 2005

Hey! Got frightened after reading NG's blog. Cuz she stated there that she couldn't get into Higher NITEC course in Simei. Then I start to wondering, since when we can make our Higher NTIEC application? Then I quickly logged into msn to see any of my ITE friend's are online.

Then I saw my god-daughter, Apple was online. And I checked out with her, she said we can only make application end of Feb or early Mar... haix... frightened me. Then she gave me a couple of web sites for more info about my course. So went to read.

Requirements:

For ITE graduates, you must have obtained at least a Grade B in all the core subjects of the Nitec in Office Skills or a Grade Point Average (GPA) > 2.8.

Progression opportunities

Higher Nitec in Accounting graduates may go on to take up a related diploma course at the polytechnics if they meet the admission criteria. Depending on the criteria laid down by the respective polytechnics, COM holders may apply for direct entry to the second year of training for selected courses. Following the polytechnic diploma, graduates may progress to pursue a degree course at the university.

Higher Nitec in Accounting graduates may apply for polytechnic courses in the following areas:

Accountancy

Accounting & Finance
Banking & Financial Management
Marketing
Banking & Financial Services
Business
Business Administration
Tourism Management

Business Management

Business Studies

*I've eliminate away some courses which I'm totally not interested in.

Course structure

To obtain the Higher Nitec in Accounting certification, you need to accumulate at least 74 credits. These must comprise 59 credits from subjects listed under Core Modules.

CORE MODULES

Accounting Fundamentals (5 credits)

Advanced Accounting 1 (5 credits)

Advanced Accounting 2 (7 credits)

Auditing (4 credits)

Business Fundamentals (4 credits)

Communication for Business (4 credits)

Costing 1 (5 credits)

Costing 2 (5 credits)

Essential Communication (4 credits)

IT (6 credits)

Intermediate Accounting (7 credits)

Electives

Banking & Financial Service (4 credits)

Business Law (4 credits)

Business Statistic (4 credits)

Business Taxation (4 credits)

Personal Taxation (4 credits)

Principles of management (4 credits)

Public Relations (5 credits)

Toursim Product & Service (3 credits)

Academic Calender for ITE Colleges

Training - 20 Jun to 20 Aug

Vacation - 20 Aug to 27 Aug

Training - 29 Aug to 15 Nov

Exam - 21 Nov to 3 Dec

Vacation - 5 Dec to 14 Jan 06

Hm... now I've all the necessary info le... no need to worry so much... just 've to wait till Mar to tt I can opt for the course that I wanna take (Accounting, Admin, Business IT)

I hope I'll luv myself more

16:01

06 January 2005

You Are a Retrospective Soul

The most misunderstood of all the soul signs.Sometimes you even have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are.You are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life.You're best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor. Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily.But if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes.For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present.You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life.

I hope I'll luv myself more

23:49

05 January 2005

Sigh... don't know what's my neighbour doing, making a lot of noise and woke me up early in the morning.

Hm... called starhub to change my plan but they say 'll 've to see am I egilible to change my plan or not. It will need 5 days to activate and 've to clear all outstanding amount if any. So troublesome man! Haix...

Jasmine working in a factory but she didn't call me. Sigh... that time I still tell her if got any job die die also must call me first but end up she called only Yi and Yun. Sigh... what kind of friend she's. Sad case.

Agnes, very nice of her for telling me all these. And she wanted to give me the factory agent number. Everyday 've to work 12hours, cannot take any off day. $5/hr, Weekdays OT and Weekends-$8. Agnes worked for 2 weeks and she got a pay of $900+ which means I'll 've to work for B.solo as a promoter for A MONTH! Haix... good right? But the disadvantages are the supervisors there are like sucks, cold-blooded! No off days, that's terrible! We're not robots!

I wish I could go and work, but as SYCO ppl noe, we gonna start our practice soon. If I'm going to work, I'm afraid that I could make it for the practice on time. I regret for submitting my SYCO so early that in the real fact I'm still in my two minds about whether to go.

Maybe if I really wanna work now, my jie there could be nice for me. But is really tough and get hurts easily due to loaded machines over there. Haix... but I really wish to earn some money so that I could buy myself a laptop!!! A personal laptop! Haix...

Haix... guess maybe I really 've to work together with my jie, jie hubby and second kor le. Work from 9am to 5pm. Then come back and shower cum dinner will be 6pm le. Then start practicing cello till... ... ... I'm tired lor. Turn off at 10pm! But don't noe jie hubby wanna me ma, cuz the working hour I work is quite short ley. Cuz I need to practice cello ma. Sigh...

Update

Hm... just now me acting as my mom cuz they insist wanna talk to my mom. Then me acting and speaking in hokkien. Haha...

Hm... finally got my plan changed. And no additional money 've to pay. Hoho~~ good neh!

Went to JP with mom. She wanna buy me a chain with a pendant but I don't want. It nice, but don't wanna waste her money. Haix... mom work till so jialat, just buy a chain w pendant and costing her $200 over. Where can?

Then went to kopitiam. Haix... no appetite to eat, then mom keep on forcing me to eat. Sianz... then ppl sit there very good wad... yet she called me to change to another table. Haix... then my phone dropped dropped dropped dropped dropped. Haix... heart pain pain pain~~

Haix... tummy pain... damn lots lots lots! Haix...

I hope I'll luv myself more

13:12

04 January 2005

A similar nightmare

I've a similar nightmare. Wahaha... I dreamt of that guy... he's now my bf! Hump... impossible... it's really a nightmare! What had happened to me? Am I being love sick or I've been playing too much of The Sims? Sigh... I really got frightened.

In my dream...

Mom was buying bedsheet and she's opening up to see. Then this guy he got the wrong one and my mom gave him a dressing down him. Ridiculous man! Haix... then I went to apologies to him "U angry ar? Sry la my dear" he seems okay but didn't talked to me.

When I tired to sms him, I realise my handphone had been stolen! Haix... then realise that Vedelene had stolen it... ai yo... haha... scared

When I got frightened, I woke up from this nightmare. Haix...

Hm... just went to meet my old friend, Agnes. Long time didn't see her le, she grew taller a little le. Hm... she composed some songs, but didn't know how to write it in a correct way. Wahaha... so went to cc and help her. What a nice piece she has composed.

We played in the middle. Haha... she F O R C E D me to take photo with her. Ai yo... any how pulled my shirt. Haha... quite a few nice one lol... haha...

Hm... then we went back home le. Haha... cuz she wanna watch tv programme ma. So... haix... kinda miss her lol...

Hope to see her again.

I hope I'll luv myself more

17:15

Dream or nightmare?

I wish I could sleep now but I was still so energetic. So here to share something.

Jie had a tiff with her hubby so tonight she stayed over here with Pearlyn. So guess tonight gotta share room with kor and her gf le. Sob...

I dreamt that my ex owned a bike, a motor bike and he fetched me to and from work. Hoho... how nice of him... he drove very fast and the wind was so cold... love sitting at the back of the bike... feeling so good.

I had another dream, I dreamt that I've never met this friend of mine for a very long time. And he suddenly came to my house and we've a chat in my room. So he was talking about his ex saying he's very SUI BIAN... haha... girls say that they like him and asked him whether wanna be her stead he also say anything. Wahaha...

Then out of the blue moon, he asked me whether me wanna be his gf or not. Then I was laughing like mad in my dream. I wondering why...

Dream or Nightmare?

I hope I'll luv myself more

01:45

03 January 2005

Emotional, yes I'm

Tv show, "Top Fun" was really exciting and funny this evening. Guess that guy was sort of like my ITE schoolmate, Eugene loves to get attention from people around him. Perhaps, there's something wrong in his head.

Sigh... there 're things that happened unpleasantly but don't wish to type it out cuz it will just remind me about the past. What's the point to remember it especially it's something unpleasant.

SY called me this afternn and we chatted on the phone for hours! Luckily I've free incoming call all day, if not jialat! Haha... Hm... we're chatting about him... she still couldn't forget about him. If I was in her shoes, guess I'll felt the same way as her too. He's really a very nice person who does things on his own accord, he helps when he can... such a nice friend where to find?

A best friend/good friend need not be with you all the time. Need not to keep you accompanied everyday... just be there for you when you need his/her help. Maybe he would be the type of true friend that I'm looking for...

R'ship, F'ship and K'ship which one will you place in the first place of your heart? For me, friends really mean a lot to me. Friends are always the one that I look for help first and they will always be there listening to me. Family members always don't understand what exactly happened to me, I cried they'll just be there mocking at me and call me "Cry Baby" instead of cheering and encouraging me. Don't like to rely on bf... dislike to trouble him... he have his own things to do. Afterall, I treasure friends more than anyone else.

I do not know why am I here in this world, I couldn't figure out the answer. I wish this world could come into an end now, I'm just tired of living in this world. Yes... I wish I could just die alone... but what's the point of dying alone and see how miserable my parents are. Sigh... they're aching all over the bodies... nagging about this and that... so what's the point of being alive in this world? Sigh...

Emotional... yes I'm...

I hope I'll luv myself more

23:53

02 January 2005

I've never really been happy even though it's a new year. Everyday there'll be someone who loves to comment loaded of things about me and we'll just start picking fight.

Asking comment from mom about the show and she added in comments with the way I dress. Well, I looks perfectly simple with just a T-shirt and short is there anything wrong? Beside, I don't go to any where, must I dress beautifully and elegantly at home?

Sigh... Last time when I was young not dare to wear short to the mama shop, always get changed to jean or whatever. And now I wore short to every where that is near our home and they commented me went crazy and called me (YIAO PO)... stupid ppl.

Human being will change de ma... what's so big deal about wearing this or that. It's just ppl lifestyle, ppl loves to dress themself in that way, so let them be. Don't and STOP being such a K P O!!!

I really detest ppl who comment about each other esp in the way they dress!!!

I hope I'll luv myself more

23:38

Life's just like suck

It was a brand new year and I gonna be a more sensible girl in the sense of helping my parents to do housework, talking to them in a nicer tone and manner, be more obedient and be nicer to friends.

Life at home was really damn bored. Everyday I woke up and does my usual routine (Wash up, eat bread, practice cello, shower, dinner, surf net and play The Sims 2 and then sleep). Sigh... I wish I could find a job soon.

Guess new family member joining too. My kor gf will be staying over here twice/wk etc. Sigh... sad case. Then around Feb elder kor gonna come back le. Haix... kinda not used to it.

Wondering dad or mom will give the spare room to who. I wish I've my own room, but at the same time, I do not wish to share room with second kor with her gf. So the best is to ask them moved to that room and I rather share the room with elder kor.

Haix... going to sleep... kinda tired. Life's just like sucks...

I hope I'll luv myself more

02:46